Traditions & Customs

The Mi-ai. While there are more young couples in Japan nowadays who are united in matrimony on their own free will, the practice of “Mi-ai” is still widely observed.  It is a traditional ritual where the soon-to-be bride and groom are interviewed about their views of marriage. This traditional event is arranged by their parents which is attended by a third party called “Nakodo” to serve as mediator and witness. Nakodo is known as the go-between who maybe an elderly couple.  However, this is not a compulsory obligation for both parties.  If parties come to an agreement to do away with the “Mi-ai” then it is still fine.  In the older days, this tradition is done so that the man meets the family of his bride and if he were favored, he would leave a fan to signify his intention to pursue the marriage. In the recent decades though, the “Mi-ai” is done simply for formal meeting and acquaintance of both family members.

The Yui-No.  When both families agreed in the marriage of their children, they have to schedule a formal dinner together on a date considered “fortunate and promising” in the Japanese almanac.  The “Yui-no” or exchanging of gifts will take place.  The bride receives her “obi” ( a kimono sash) as a symbol of woman virtue while the groom gets his “hakama”, a skirt symbolising fidelity.  Aside from the main gifts of “obi” and “hakama”, the bride and groom will obtain some more items that symbolyse lasting happiness and enduring fortunes. “Naga-Noshi”, an abalone shell used to make crafts and gifts. “Katsuo-Bushi”, symbolising lasting marriage is a preserved food used to make soup stock.  “Surume”, a dried cuttlefish to wish lasting marriage like Katsuo-Bushi.  “Mokuroku”, containing list of gifts exchanged in the engagement. “Shiraga”, a hemp fiber to symbolise strong family.  “Konbu”, fertility offering to have happy and healthy kids in the future. “Sake” casks, symbolysing obedience and gentleness in marriage.  “Suehiro”, a traditional fan, it is opened end to end to wish bigger and brighter future. “ Yanagi-daru” a wine cask for the purpose of sake wine and money.

The Wedding Kimono. The white wedding kimono is known as “Shiro-Maku” which means white – Shiro and pure – maku. This traditional clothing originated in the Edo period in the 17th to19th century which is was mainly dressed by court nobles.  There are many different Japanese wedding kimono.  The “obi” which is one of these is not however very prominent during the Edo period.  The white wedding kimono that is worn during the wedding ceremony is called “ Uchikake”.the most beautiful and expensive kind used for women having traditional Japanese wedding. It is a very long wedding clothing that the bride needs to be assisted by her attendants while walking.  On the other, the traditional kimono worn by a groom is a combination of a “monstsuki” and a short “haori” overcoat with “hakama” pants. This masculine kimono is used for special occasions like Japanese traditional wedding.  It is full length and tucked into the pants.  Montsuki kimono color is black with white crests. The outer garment of the groom’s kimono is the “hakama” which is made up of cotton or rayon.

The Tsuru.  Crane or “Tsuru” is among the oldest birds on earth and has been part of Japanese wedding custom.  ‘Tsuru” are taken as a customary part in wedding ceremonies for it symbolyses peace and long life.  It is believed that 1000 folded paper origami cranes grants wishes.